Author, speaker, and teacher, Rosie Molinary, empowers women to embrace their authentic selves so they can live their passion and purpose and give their gifts to the world. The author of Beautiful You: A Daily Guide to Radical Self Acceptance and Hijas Americanas: Beauty, Body Image, and Growing Up Latina, she teaches body image at the University of North Carolina-Charlotte and facilitates transformative workshops and retreats for women. You can follow her on Facebook and Twitter.
Stop. Right now and get off the ride. Get off the ride that self-hate and defeat and apathy have taken you on.
You are not quitting. You are simply starting anew in a different direction. You are actually arriving.
And this direction. This is the direction of your dreams. This is the direction of hope and healing. This is the direction of your truth.
It is calling for you.
You will take ten steps and the first step will be crystal clear. It will sound so big in your head that you know it is right. It will be your I HAVE DECIDED step and it will be like a drumbeat through your whole body. It will be electric.
But then steps two through ten will be softer. Not because they are any less significant; they are not. But because you are getting used to them. Your feet are sinking into those steps. They are learning the way and the way is feeling more and more familiar. But then at step ten, you will stop and you will look back over your shoulder. And you will flounder.
And let me tell you right now that floundering is not valuable information. That floundering is fear. It’s not your hope. It’s not your healing. It’s just that little voice inside your head that sometimes likes to tell you to play small and scared making another appearance in your life. And it thinks that if it flirts with you a little bit, you will come back to it. It thinks you are that easy. And maybe once or twice in the past, you have been. But this time, you are not. I can see it in you. You know too much now to defy the truth, to defy your truth. So give that place you once were one last look over your shoulder. Shake your finger at it, if you have to. no. nO. N0. NO. NO! There you go. Because you have indeed decided. You have decided that you are done. You are done with buying the false goods that self-limitation has been selling. You are done with selling yourself out. You are done with denying the world all the good you have to offer. You are done with playing small.
So go ahead and tell that small, scared little voice where you want it to go. It can go wherever you want to tell it as long as that place doesn’t involve taking residence in side of you. Go ahead and send it on its way. Don’t bother with whispering it your forwarding address. It doesn’t get to visit you again. Not ever.
Now, back to this walk, back to this full-on strut into your possibility, your power, your purpose, your passion. Back to getting real. Getting really into you so that you can fortify yourself in a way that allows you to be authentic and true and give the world what you are meant to be giving at this moment in time.
After your tenth step, you settle in. It feels real to you. You understand that you can make it even more real. And so you will begin the work of realizing what real looks like to you, what true and love and power and passion and purpose– what all those big words look like to you.
Start today with just owning that walk. Ground your feet into every step. Take up some real estate on that stroll. Make your presence know. You are arriving today. You don’t have to know what the rest of the journey is going to look like right now. You simply need to know what it does not look like. It doesn’t have self-hate or doubt or defeat driving it. It simply has your hope, your power, your spunk all packaged right into you.
On this walk, you will come to a door. You will wonder whether or not you should open it. Some old voice that you faintly recognize might whisper no. Again, you will tell it where to go. And, then, the voice that you recognize as your truth will tell you yes. And you will fling open that door and step into everything you could have ever imagined.
photo by kevin dooley // cc